Well cut my hair and call me apostate! *to be said in your best Texas accent*

apostate

This week Attorney Matt Barber, president of Liberty Counsel Action, had anti-gay activist Peter LaBarbera as his guest on his “Faith and Freedom” webcast. Their topic? John Shore & Dan Savage’s NALT Christians Project. The gist of their hate fueled ramblings is this:

“To have vile, anti-Christian bigots, who are pushing a radical, dangerous sexual anarchist agenda, presuming to lecture Christians, and have people — self-identified Christians, liberal so-called Christians — upload videos about how they support something that God calls an abomination — there’s no other word for it — it’s apostasy when you have self-described Christians do it.”

This week I was also a guest on a web interview blog…Outlaw Theology with The Whiskey Preacher on Patheos.com (I will be posting links as soon as they are up!!). Full disclosure: you will not be seeing either Peter LaBarbera or Matt Barber interviewed there anytime soon. Although, I am sure Phil (aka The Whiskey Preacher) would have lots of great questions for them. :) Funny thing is, my interview was actually about my personal evolution in becoming a welcoming and affirming christian/pastor/blogger. When we were done, Phil was also kind enough to help me make my very own NALT video (Which will also be up soon!!!!). I am sure Mr. Barber and Mr. LaBarbera will be very disappointed with what I had to say.  But that’s okay because I am very disappointed with what they had to say. They are upset that we NALT (not all like that) christians are making videos supporting something the Scriptures call an abomination.  Well, I have news for them, I support several things the Bible calls an abomination and some it just says are wrong. GASP! Say it isn’t so!!! (I bet my friends from the beginning of the article probably also support some of these given I have seen their sideburns). That’s right lovelies, along with fully supporting my LGBTQ brothers and sisters, I also support:

  • Eating shellfish
  • Having sex with a woman (you are married to) who is on her period (if she is consenting, OBVIOUSLY)
  • The menswear look for ladies (hello, Diane Keaton)
  • Kilts for the dudes
  • Cutting your sideburns
  • Re-marrying someone you divorced (I have known several couples who have done this)
  • Marrying someone new after you get divorced
  • I am decidedly pro bacon, pepperoni, honeybaked ham, carnitas and pork chops.
  • Wearing clothing with more than one type of fiber
  • I am down with crop rotation (I come from several generations of farmers)
  • There is a bunch of stuff the Bible says you can’t touch, some are kind of gross but I am cool with you touching them (for instance I am for you touching a dead pig for the purposes of playing football)
  • Tattoos, even though I don’t have any
  • Long hair for men and short hair for women
  • Women praying with their heads uncovered
  • Women teaching men and/or boys and/or other women/girls (yes, even in church)
  • Women NOT being property of either father or husband or brother or dead husband’s brother
  • I am cool with it if you don’t want to marry your rapist
  • If your husband is getting mugged and you think you can stop things by grabbing the guys junk really hard…I promise I won’t cut off your hand
  • I won’t be mad if you don’t stone your kid for dishonoring you
  • I am even good with you working on Saturday or Sunday or even paying someone else to work by serving you lunch after church (I know I do)

Here is the thing, these two guys do not follow every instruction given in the Bible. They. Just. Don’t. They interpret. They pick and they choose. And I am sure they use all sorts of things to support their beliefs. So do I. So do I. I don’t know about you but when I read scripture, some things are crystal clear, some are blurry and some are downright opaque. The clearest thing I can find is that I am supposed to love God and love people, ALL PEOPLE. No if. No until. No unless. I just don’t think Jesus gives me another option.

BONUS: DID YOU NOTICE APOSTATE LITERALLY MEANS “RUNAWAY SLAVE” IN THE GREEK. I KIND OF LIKE THAT.

If you would like to know what I do with any of the “clobber passages” you can check out the series I did awhile back. I addressed them all. or If you would rather watch a video check out Matthew Vines. He rocks.
You can also see the response of the creators of the NALT Christians Projects here.

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13 thoughts on “Well cut my hair and call me apostate! *to be said in your best Texas accent*

  1. I don’t know where Jesus mentioned that acting self-righteously about your sexual orientation in order to generate support was a good thing. Must have missed that part.

    • I am not sure what you mean about “acting self-righteously about your sexual orientation”. I try very hard not to be self righteous about my heterosexuality. I think this post demonstrates this(perhaps you thought I was a lesbian?).
      If you are referring to the NALT Christians Project, all people are trying to do is counter act all the hate aimed at the LGBTQ community from those in the greater Christian community.
      I admit in the article that I pick and choose what I see at literal, figurative, cultural and universal in the scriptures. We all do.
      It seems to me you, from the tone of your comment, you and the gentlemen in the article are much more self righteous when it comes to your sexuality.
      I wish you well,
      M

      • No. You got me wrong, and I must have misundersstood what the NALT Christians were about. I meant the self-righteousness who call others acts “abominations” without knowing what they’re really going through and ignoring their own wrongdoings. I do not pretend to know and understand God’s will when it comes to other people’s sexuality. Sorry for the misunderstanding.

  2. Yes, that.

    I do, however, I think that there is probably a better word than apostate for people like us. That dude just must not have a very large vocabulary and also probably doesn’t use curse words in interviews.

    And I praise God that there are a few of us that are Not Fucking Like That. And even more so that this number is growing

  3. I guess I’m apostate too: I don’t want to own a Canadian…..or be owned by a Mexican. The truth is, I am not apostate. I follow the two rules Christ, the son of God, from whom the name “Christians” come: Love God. Love one another. I think Mr. Barber and Mr. LaBarbera might want to reevaluate the term apostate and see if it does apply to them.

  4. scribblegurl says:

    THIS. You are absolutely awesome. :)

    I do not always succeed, but I try to love God (which is not that hard, unless I’m mad at Him) and love other humans (much, much harder, especially when faced with boneheads like the 2 mentioned above). Also, God granted Christ’s grace to ALL creatures, not just the “Christian” ones. I think certain people have a hard time remembering that, and some have had no problems informing me I am not a Christian because I don’t agree with their narrow, cherry-picking view of “real Christianity.” I’m really glad I found your blog. You remind me that not all those who are of a profound religious view are intolerant jerks.

  5. Victoria says:

    This si so strange – out of the blue I was for some reason looking up “Modest is Hottest” on Google and clicked on an article you wrote. You are an amazing refreshment….
    I have always had an intimate relationship with God as my Father and Jesus as the Lover of my Soul – never a perfect woman, but always with a dependence on my perfect Savior who I know would never give up on me. From the valleys of my life I have been lifted, and ashes blown off by a gracious God, to be used to heal the lost and broken women all over the world. I have survived various abuses, persecusions, but still managed to raise 2 Godly women on my own- yes, through homeschooling! – who are strong minded, compassionate and ultra cool (like their mom:) No matter what I have done for the Lord (and it has only been through His power and direction), I am told by the church it is all for nothing because I am divorced. I am 46 but look 30 (a miracle in itself with the stresses I have faced) so i don’t dress old, I don’t act old – I am modest but I am fun. God has restored my youth and what the enemy had stolen – something I weep in gratitude and humility over, so often. But in this- my looks, the freedom I have to finally be the woman God created me to be – I am judged and ridiculed. I only have pity on my brothers and sister who are so closed into their hate-based religion. For they deny themselves the opportunity to truly know God in a deeper way. But meanwhile, I strap on my boots and go out in the world with my imperfect life but carrying in me a perfect Savior to help clean up the mess they create for the lost and the broken who desperately need to know true Love.
    Anyway, thank you for your straightforwardness on these issues. It is refreshing to know some of us “different” women of God are not alone. Bless you bigtime, girl!

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